That filter between your mind and your mouth

It's unfortunate or perhaps fortunate that we all forget about that filter between the mind in the mouth.  I know that in the past mine was off about 98% of the time, there is a part of me that misses it being off.  I would say exactly what I was thinking and not give a damn if it offended anyone, after all, why lie?  Now my filter is sometimes up to guard against being hurt or hurting someone else, but I can be pushed to the point where I just turn it off and am done with it.

My sons are great with not having a filter, Thing One (age 9) sees a short guy (about 5'4") working in a store and he asks "Are you a midget?"  or from my Thing Two (age 7) (to a man who said hi to them while passing on the street) "You REALLY need to brush your teeth!!" They are always very loudly pointing things in other people that we all notice, but don't say anything about.  And when someone does or says something wrong, in life or to another person, they don't hesitate to tell them about it.  This is actually one of the greatest things, and sometimes most embarrassing things that my kids do!  So, I have my children to remind me that I need to open my big fat mouth even if it is embarrassing for me or the other person.

This is who I am

 At this point I should actually say what I'm thinking, for example (and I'm going to keep my temper since I've been biting my tongue till it's bleeding and nearly cut off) I am so fucking sick of hearing certain people talk shit on friends of mine!  I like the people in question as themselves, but when it comes to talking about other friends, who have been nothing but friends to me, is an ugly thing and puts a huge black mark on everything about the speaker.  I don't want to hear it anymore and that's that.  I don't know why the attacks are so harsh, but I am fed up with it and it's been eating away at my mind.  There that's one.  Another is I'm tired of the disappearing act, I want to know just what is going on, even if it's unknown, just tell me something general.  I hate feeling like there is a game being played and although it doesn't feel like it right now, that's also something that's been weighing heavy on my mind.  That's that for there also.  I have a lot going on in my life and I don't have time for all the extra special baggage and bullshit of others, I love my friends and I am there, but don't bring me down. Please feel free to comment, follow, or tell me I'm crap!  Tell me about your filter, thanks for reading!